Chatting on an online dating app

Getting talking to someone online can be a different experience – especially if you’re used to meeting people in person, but here at Even we are here to support single parents who are looking to start something with someone. From approaching someone on an online dating app to tips on what to do when you’re unsure what to do, we’re here to give you a few pieces of advice on how to get chatting on an online dating app.

Tips for starting (and maintaining) a chat when online dating

But how do you do it? It might have been a while since you’ve been out there, or you just might be bored with having the same conversation on dating apps over and over again. Maintaining a chat is just as important as starting one, so we’ve got a few tips for that too:

• Ask them about something that’s on their profile:  bring up something that’s on their profile. Why did you like them in the first place? Remember that not all parents want to talk about their children right away, so maybe leave the baby talk to a later date.
• Deep dive with them: asking someone something deep (but not too deep), can help you really get to know them as soon as possible. That avoids any conflict about your philosophies down the line, so it kills two birds with one stone.
• Tell them what you’re looking for: to do this, you have to figure out what you want from your dating life first. So ask yourself the question: what do I want? Starting with your desires means that no one is left unsure or insecure about their position in your dating life.
• Ask them what they’re looking for: on the other hand, you could start with a question. Asking them what they want shouldn’t be something you’re afraid of.  It’s important to talk to someone you might want to date about what they want – you don’t want to end up in a situation further down the line where your desires don’t match!
• Start with a joke: get your funny bone out! Telling a joke or a cheesy pickup line can be a good way to get to know them a bit more and even make them laugh.

How to tell someone you want to see more of them

Chat’s going well? Taking things to the next level can sometimes be intimidating, but we are here to make sure that when you want to take someone out, you know exactly what to say:

• Ask to move the chat off the app: moving to a more personal way of chatting (texting or messaging on social media) is a good way to get their number and sends a good message that you like them.
• Try out a subtle pickup line: making them laugh, again, is a great way to test the waters and their humour, if it aligns then you’ll find yourselves naturally gravitating towards one another.
• Ask them out on a real life date: just take the plunge! Ask them out on a date and really take things to the next level.

How to tell someone you’re not interested

If you’ve figured out the person you’re talking to isn’t right for you or you’re looking for something different, it can be intimidating to tell them. Breaking up is never easy, we know (yes, that’s an ABBA reference) so we’ve come up with a few tips on how to tell someone you’re just not that into them:

• Just tell them straight up! :  Don’t be afraid to tell them that you might like them as a person, but no as a potential partner or someone you want to date, they’re not doing it for you. Remember to be kind and treat others with respect.
• Stop apologizing and don’t avoid that conversation: you don’t need to be sorry for not wanting to date someone, when it’s not happening, it’s not happening. Let them know gently and kindly, but it’s OK to say, “I don’t think this can go any further”.
• No to ghosting: ghosting is when you stop replying to someone, and it’s important to not do that to someone. Ghosting can really hurt people’s feelings, so it’s best to let them know how you’re really feeling.
• Centralize yourself (yes, it’s OK to be selfish):use “I” statements when you’re talking about not wanting to take things further. Don’t blame anyone else (even if it’s tempting) for not having feelings, be honest.

Start your single parent dating journey today with Even

If you’re looking to meet someone new, start dating again after a while, or you’re just having a nose around to see if you want to dip your toes back into the dating pool, Even is here for single parents who are new to free dating apps (and old hands, too). Meet people who really understand what it’s like to have a family of their own, and start a relationship (perhaps) with someone who you really get along with.

We know it can be hard to make time and space in your life for love when you’re juggling work and your family, but Even is here to make sure that when you’re ready to start dating again, and meet some people you really, really like.